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06/28/2008
The end
School is over forever
I am too uterly exhuasted to post any more.
...or use correct grammar
xXx
20:01 Permalink | Comments (0) | Email this
06/23/2008
And she returns...
...And don't think I didn't hear your groan.
I have finished my 7 days of exams. I have done well in biology and chemistry (I had already written the biology synoptic essay of my own accord for revision - plant reproduction!! :D :D) and I am TERRIFIED about music - but such is the way. Hopefully my more than adequate marks from last year will tide me over. (*crosses fingers*)
I have also been out to dinner, a party and a ball.... Met some really rather interesting and entertaining new people, worked out how to do our song for Cabaret (Wed and Thur this week)... and written the A section of a gig. You shouldn't let me spend hours tuning on a recorder :P gone through every dance form I know from pavanne to sarabande to gig to reel.... :D oh and lots of minuets because they are pretty.
Oh and another song on the train... well beginnings of
Different trains honey, different line
Different trains/ways(?) honey, different mind
You'll go your way
And I'll go mine
You've done you worst
Soon I'll be feeling just fine / now I'm feeling just fine (?)
xXx
13:51 Posted in Fun , Life , Music | Permalink | Comments (0) | Email this
06/20/2008
This is going around the folky people...
"please, please, PLEASE sign this petition! the government are trying to pass a "violent crimes reduction bill" which will illegalise buying swords generally. unfortunately this also applies to dance swords! rapper, longsword, highland, etc. also possibly morris sticks. there is a exemption for sporting activites and historical reenactment, and the petition is to get dance included in this exemption.
please sign this, and pass it on to anybody you know who might be interested. we can't let our wonderful culture die out!! they can't do this to us!! note: closing date to sign is 25th june.
petitions.pm.gov.uk/dancer
please sign!"
Right... so I read the bill from 2005/6, but I can find no details of what the amendments actually are. Questions: "surely dance is classed as a sport?" and "aren't most dance swords not weapons anyway as they lack both a blade or a point"
Martial arts and fighting sports I assume are classed as sport.
and WHY CANT THESE THINGS BE MADE CLEAR AND UNDERSTANDABLE AND MORE IMPORTANTLY
ACCESSIBLE
Oh yes, then we might actually be able to contribute.... I forgot that.
Here's to Democracy,
xXx
08:36 Posted in FOLK | Permalink | Comments (2) | Email this
06/10/2008
She has to do something to keep herself calm
It should not affect me so much. It shouldn't. Or effect if that is the right one. It shouldn't... but it does.
That is all.
Nothing more and nothing less.
But when you don't have the time to crash, you do what you can to keep yourself moving.
Anything you can.
Such is the way.
It's a pity really
xXx
20:47 Posted in Thoughts | Permalink | Comments (0) | Email this
Rant
I have 6 exams.
They actually matter.
I have two years work to learn for all 3 subjects.
Only ONE of the papers is NOT synoptic.
I am trying to move country next year.
I am trying to set up 3 or 4 different bank accounts.
I don't understand my phone company.
The Customer Services for orange play AWFUL music when you are on hold.
I have no time to either exercise or play music.
I have two music lessons in the next week.
Everyone is wanting me to sort out the summer.
I am going to get no work done this weekend either :(
I have lost my favourite bra - at school somewhere.
THEY HAVE LOCKED MY ROOM for me!
My room is covered in notes: the walls, the bed, the floor... havn't got to the window yet!
AND I HAVE TORN THE LIGAMENT IN MY FOOT!!!!!!!!!!!!
xXx
15:09 Posted in Complete Random Junk! | Permalink | Comments (2) | Email this
06/07/2008
So My day.... just incase you cared :P
7:30 - Wake up (suppsedly so I can FINALLY DO some organ practise)... turn over and go back to sleep
8:45 - Wake up... still have headache and bleary brain, but find tea and clothes and get up
9:30 - Cycle into town
9:45 - buy a dress for my sister (I hav a student card)
10:00 - meet a friend for coffee...
....
....
15:00 turn up at the Sports Hall for Lifeguarding
21:00 Leave the Sports Hall after cleaning up and all that fun!
....
The dots repressent a combination of gyming (because I dont ache quite enough today so should go again), organ (Because I MUST MUST MUST MUST MUST MUST MUST MUST MUST do some) and Music Revision (Because Ditto)....
That said, it is the practical paper first and my chorales seem to have become entirely mood dependant... I shall do them anyway. And get JMJD to mark - make his day to be able to go through them again with his "CONtraVERtial" (drawled tone and the CAPS indicate accent) and his look of glee at finding (numerous in my case) parallel fifths.
Today is a day for parenthesis.
xXx
08:16 Posted in Complete Random Junk! | Permalink | Comments (0) | Email this
06/02/2008
Displacement
The trouble with displacement... is that is it only temporarily.
Say, for example, you choose to displace an emotion for an evening so you can enjoy yourself (however random you appear) then at some point that emotion will come back. Usually it comes back when the evening is over. When everyone else has gone. When it is just you and no one to see...
I can never work out if that is better or worse.
xXx
23:14 Posted in Thoughts | Permalink | Comments (0) | Email this
Soundtrack to my life... stolen from Em
So, here's how it works:
1. Open your library (iTunes, Winamp, Media Player, iPod, etc)
2. Put it on shuffle
3. Press play
4. For every question, type the song that's playing
5. Don't lie and try to pretend you're cool and no disclaimers allowed.
Opening Credits:
Black Wave - The Shins
Waking Up:
Beautiful One - Time Hughes
First Day At School:
The Falmouth Packet / Haul Away Joe - Show Of Hands
Falling In Love:
Nature Boy - Bowie (Moulin Rouge - so true: the greatest thing you'll ever learn...)
Fight Song:
The Man I Killed - Mike Ryan and Pete Harris (apparently)
Breaking Up:
The Burning Times - Artisan
Prom:
The Battle of Marfa Rhuddlan
Mental Breakdown:
Valentine - The Delays
Driving:
You Shook me ALL night long - Hayseed Dixie remix
Flashback:
I need you to turn to - Maddy Prior and the Girls
Getting back together:
Gree Grows the Laurel - Cara Dillon
Wedding:
On the Road Again - Katie Melua (something like that)
Black Diamonds - Jez Lowe (... interesting)
Life in the Fast Lane - The Eagals
Death Scene:
Courting is a Pleasure - Show of Hands
Funeral Song:
How Can I tell you - Cat Stevens
(Speed - Artisan)
Giver of life - Tim Hughes :D :D
16:49 Permalink | Comments (0) | Email this
BCD Clock
The people at my Dad's work think I'm geeky.
They might also have evidense to support this.
When I saw this my face lit up, my eyes shone, I lost all power's of speech and valid communication and trails of green smoke trailed across the room. It is sooo soooo cool! I mean REALLY cool. As in just *the best* idea ever. It's just pretty :D And cool... and .... and ... and I WANT ONE!
Actually... screw that. Having seen that website, I want to make one. But I'll settle for buying one at the moment as I don't have the time or parts or time... really it's just the time.
Apparently... liking my decimal clocks to be coded in base two is somewhat geeky. Apparently this is a characteristic that is of significant note in any Homo sapien with two x chromosomes. Apparently I became a talking point at his work for a few days after this revelation.
I also like logical/maths puzzels and do them for fun. I think xkcd is hilareous. OOTS isn't too bad either. I play dungeons and dragons and have dipped into various other role-play games. I need to know how things work. I am more than happy to read copious volumes of Sci-Fi, and then point out all the physical impossabilities and how it could have been made more accurate. The most entertaining game I have played in the last 18 months is one that involves leaning magentic pieces up against each other so that the the repulsice forces balance and they stay upright (I need to practise seeing magnetic fields on the playing area). I am happy to spend hours looking over the schematics for a light confocal microscope trying (sometimes in vain) to understand. I will grin inanely once I have solved a difficult problem. And I will shout at youif you give me the answers first (unless it is tiresome integration and I am in a bad mood).
Have we cleared this up now :P
xXx
10:02 Posted in Science | Permalink | Comments (2) | Email this
Me and my imaginary immune system
Well actually I reckon it is there and reasonably active at the moment. Although not in a good mood with me.
Currently my immune system is fighting wars on all fronts.
I have a tummy bug which is making me sick and not helping me maintain anything like a reasonable appetite. On top of that I have cut my lip open (bitten it about 7 of 8 times in the past 4 days - once it is swollen the chances of biting it again increase exponentially!) so they are fighting all sorts of bugs off there. Summer has kicked in with a vengence (No sun :( :( ) and my lungs are playing havoc - on top of that my boyfriend and my sister seem to have a caugh, so even if I havn't contracted it I am still fighting yet more bugs.
I am sleeping well periodically, but in a near constant state of fatigue which means I am in glasses for almost everything an cease to be functional at around 6pm. Headaches and dizziness have become a standard state of affairs.
And I have just let the nurse inject me with (I'm assuming dead) forms of Hep B. Which REALLY hurt.
Anyway... that can't please it as now it also has the task of making me lots of Memory T and B lymphocytes for that as well...
Might go and find some neurofen in a moment, but I am living off the stuff.
Either way, I have decided to give me immune system a hand. Firstly by remembering to *take* all my asthma drugs and anti-histamine. Secondly by drinking enough water. Thirdly by putting bonjella on my lip - reduces swelling so less likely to bite it! Fouthly by taking in sufficient Vitamin C / Mg / Ca etc... (mostly orange juice so far :P although I intend to stew some apples in cinnamon for lunch). Finally I have on my desk a large mug of strong, sweet coffee that I fully intend to finish drinking,
This is just a comfort thing
xXx
09:15 Posted in Complete Random Junk! | Permalink | Comments (0) | Email this
06/01/2008
Greetings
I bid you greetings
All you angry men
And outraged women
Who sit and stare - for hours on end -
At the news reels on your TV screen
Who scroll through pages of
INTERNET HEADLINES
Tut and shake your head
Or shake your fist
And swear about injustice
I bid you greetings
You! Who's blood boils
And who's muscle trembles
In contempt
At the Dictators, the TNCs, the Banks, the Presidents, the Priests and the Teachers
As you sit and stare
And wait for the next headline
As you sit and stare
Eagar for the next to fuel your mindless fury
As you sit and stare
As you sit
As you sit
AND DO NOTHING
You sit and stare
At the woman beaten blue by a teenage daughter
At the vicar up in court, or the poedophile for rape
At the athlete torn apart by a long forgotten mine
At the young girl in the brothel waiting for her client
At the father searching in the ruins of a blowout
For a wife, for a parent, for a child, for a cousin, for an uncle, for a grandson, for a friend... for anybody?
You sit and stare
At a natural disaster wreaking havoc on a city
And swear hatred at the leaders,
At their lack of human pity
You sit and stare
And do nothing.
In your youth
In your passion
In your strength
In your self
You who have the power to shake the mountains
Who have the might to tople the steeples
And tear down the palaces
You have the feet that could teach the world to dance
You have the hands that could heal the scars that still deform
You have the tongues that could bring wisdom
You have the minds that could imagine something better
Most of all you have the hearts
The anger
The passion
The blood and the guts
Most of all you have the heart
That could
Give you
Strength
To change things
But you don't
You sit and stare.
In your selfish, smugness and self-centred pious righteousness
You watch the world go to hell in a handcart
And shake your head
And shake your fist
Then turn the TV off
And go to bed.
At least those without the wit, or the compassion...
Without the heart or the soul to be angry...
At least they can sleep
Without their own hypocrisy tainting their dreams
I bid you greetings
And I bid you goodnight
You sicken me.
xXx
18:10 Posted in Complete Random Junk! , Life , Poetry , Thoughts | Permalink | Comments (0) | Email this
Challenge
Don't judge me for the clothes I wear - they will be different tomorrow.
Don't judge me for the music I listen to - I can turn it off.
Don't judge me for the salary I earn - I work for what I can, same as you.
Do not judge me for my education - The skills we aquire are nothing to how we apply them.
Don't judge me for the company I keep - I might see something in them you don't.
Don't judge me for the leaders I obey - obeidience does not equate to respect.
Don't judge me for the lover's I chose - Who I love does not define me.
Don't judge me for the Gods I worship or the temple I use - For you know the truth no better than I.
Don't judge me for my intelligence - Knowledge can only ever lead us so far.
Don't judge me for my age - years bring as much folly as wisdom.
Don't judge me for my politics - you do not know my reasons.
Don't judge me by what I am called - there is nothing in a name.
Judge me by my actions; and see all the above fall into perspective.
And I shall judge you by yours.
xXx
16:38 Posted in Thoughts | Permalink | Comments (0) | Email this
What is different
No longer do I sit at the end of your bed and talk long into the night. No longer do I ask your approval or seek to justify my choice by pointing out virtues and wisdom (?) and above all the potential they have for all that could be good. No longer do I try to twist their words and their actions into something - anything - I can respect.
No longer do you try to calm me; try to find ways to agree with my self-deception. This time is not like those times before. You've said so yourself.
This time.
I don't need your approval. And for that very reason, I am fairly certain I have it. But I DONT NEED it. I have made my choice (if you can call it that) and I regret nothing. I don't need to justify. I don't need to explain. I don't need your reassurance and your blessing.
My life, my choice, my happiness. And for once I am happy. More than I can say.
But not so much that you can't catch a glimpse in my voice, or my face, or my words.... from time to time.
Does the security bring the happiness?
Does the happiness allow me to feel secure?
Does it matter?
If I can never explain. If there is no need to justify. If I feel no obligation to answer for myself or my choice, then the answer is probably not.
No longer do I sit at the end of your bed and talk long into the night, because there is nothing I can say. You can see far better what I would like to say, if you just spend just one day watching.
And that is what is different this time.
xXx
08:49 Posted in Thoughts | Permalink | Comments (0) | Email this